Gag reflex alert: You might want to skip this section if you are squeamish or sensitive.
Unfortunately, or fortunately, depending on how you look at
it, I have very little sense of smell. I think it is from many years of using
allergy medications when I was younger. They damaged the inside of my nose
somehow. I have a range of smells that I can smell mostly on opposite ends of
the smelly scale, really good or really bad. Scented candles? Nope, I generally
can’t smell them at all. One good side effect of this problem, or maybe it’s an
adaptation I created for myself, I can “turn off” the smell if I want. The only
time I truly have a good sense of smell is when I’m severely hung over! Usually
I wish the “hard of smelling” woud come back when I’m in that situation.
So how is the game played? Sometimes I could smell something
horrible – usually a dead animal or an uneaten rodent. Often times I could
smell it, but I couldn’t find the source. With usually about 100+ animals in
the collection at any given time, there was not always an easy way to find the
source of the stench.
There were times when I would have to call someone over with a better
sense of smell and we would play what I liked to called, America’s favorite
game show, “What’s That Smell?” That poor, unfortunate soul who received the
call would usually end up coughing and gagging when said smell was finally
identified. Regurgitated rodent is one of the most heinous scents on this
earth. It is worse than dead rodent for sure.
As long as I’m on the topic… sometimes snakes will musk when
they are afraid. A lot of times, it’s the big, nasty snakes. However, the teeny tiny
ones will do it too. California kingsnakes, other kings and milks are
notorious for musking, especially babies or animals that haven’t been handled
much. One time Chad (a volunteer) and I were cleaning a yellow anaconda’s cage. The snake was
as mean as cat shit. Every time we touched it, it would thrash and musk. Thank
goodness it was only about 6 ft. long. If it was 10-12 ft., I don’t think I
would have been able to deal with it at all. The yellow anacondas don’t get as big as
the green ones, but are twice as nasty. A lot of snakes will calm down once
they are kept warm enough and fed on a regular basis. No such luck with this animal.
I remember, the snake was in my office. Overflow animals were often kept in the office and that was
the case with the anaconda. So, Chad reached into the cage to grab him. It must
have been winter. I remember that he was wearing a white, long sleeved
sweatshirt. As he grabbed the snake’s neck so it wouldn’t bite him, it’s back
end whipped around and thick, disgusting musk flew all over both of us! There
is no way to describe the smell, but I’ll try. If you have a cat or dog, they
have anal glands next to their butts. Sometimes cats or dogs will have problems
with those and scoot across the floor. Or, you might take your cat or dog to
the vet and they will express their anal glands (empty them!). That stuff
stinks horribly. The anaconda’s musk is so much worse! It’s like cat anal
glands on steroids.
It looked like dark mustard, but had the consistency of
mayonnaise. The reason I remember the long-sleeved sweatshirt was because one
sleeve was covered in the goo. Both of us screamed, then laughed and gagged
simultaneously. I had some in my hair. Gross. But, Chad’s clothing was
saturated. It was so disgusting. We didn’t have to play “What’s That Smell.” We
knew exactly where it was.
Dead animals are something else entirely. Whether it was a
rescue that didn’t make it or an uneaten prey item, that is a very distinct
smell. One time I was in the Towsontown Mall and I could smell something dead
near a potted plant, probably a rodent. It wasn’t strong enough to be anything
big. But yes, I have a great nose for death. It’s a horrible gift. The smell is
a sickening sweet odor at times, other times, after a long wait,
it’s just really disgusting.
Sometimes there were prizes for winning, “What’s That
Smell.” Maybe I’d buy a pizza for the clean-up crew. Once the offending object
was removed and the bag outside, the smell usually went away quickly. Even now,
just thinking about it turns my stomach a little.
